I am not sure how to feel about his injury. On the one hand, I am overjoyed that the greatest threat to America's supremacy and/or democracy is now thrawted; however, I am disappointed Kobayashi was felled about his own mouth and not one of our own hot dog swallowing champions– like her or her or her.
Although it is fitting for the world's greatest competitive eater to lose not to another man or pile of processed meat but rather to jaw arthritis – which will now forever be known as Kobayashi Disease.
God speed you diminuitive human garbage disposal; rest well knowing your gluttunous accomplishments well never be forgotten, but most likely will be eclipsed by a morbidly obese bus driver or divorced soccer mom using food to compensate for her sense of lonliness and self loathing.
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